>Really, stop being a negative influence and try to see that talent is in large part offset by dedication and time put in. If you want to succeed at something, anything, that does not require some kind of genetic component then go and pursue it relentlessly and be excellent, or at least as good as you can do it, whatever it is.
I know this is an unpopular sentiment on this site, but the problem is that everything has at least some genetic component. In the extreme case, rats share about 95% of their DNA with humans but are incapable of doing any of our jobs or even living a decade. Even amongst humans, large differences exist: short people can never become NBA centers, 200cm people can never be great gymnasts, someone with Down's syndrome isn't going to make it as a physicist.
One heart breaking example I witnessed personally was a family member. He wanted more than anything to be a classical musician. From the age of four, he was taught by the same teacher who trained a very successful NY Philharmonic pianist (opera coach). He practiced many hours a day all through his school years and earned both undergraduate and graduate degrees in clarinet performance. By any objective measure he was a very good clarinetist. But he wasn't good enough to make a real living at it. Unlike his mother, who had perfect pitch by the end of grade school, he never developed it. He saw more than one talented peer surpass him in despite his extreme work ethic. In the end, after putting over 25 years of his life and his passion into it, he finally gave up on his dream and became a programmer. Unlike his experiences in music, he very quickly rose to the top of development groups and it was he who was the one surpassing others who had been working at it longer and harder.
Talent matters. There probably haven't been any specific genes linked with business ability as there have been with musical or leaping abilities, but it would be naive to assume that everyone can win if only they sacrifice enough. In many marginal cases, I'm sure effort would make the difference. In other cases, it would just be robbing oneself of valuable time that could be better spent on another pursuit.
I always push back against this argument, because the general view is that "innate abilities" matter far, far more than they actually do, and this is the reason for many lost opportunities. Woe to the "smart" kid who quickly learns to avoid anything that isn't easy on the first try.
The examples that people give tend to be things like professional athletes and classical musicians, for the simple reason that these kinds of professions are exceptions that are dramatically different from just about anything else you can do with your life.
The reasons why professional athletes are exceptions are more obvious (how many kids want to be pro athletes vs. how many pro athletes does the world need?), so let's look at the professional classical musician.
How many clarinetists are there in the world that make a good living at it? If we rule out the ones making a fairly poor living teaching privately or in high schools, universities, conservatories, etc. (and I'm guessing your family member didn't want to go this route), it's an extremely small, extraordinarily competitive pool, and you need to be at the top of the game to get any chair at all in a good orchestra (and the "winners" may stay in the orchestra for many decades, so orchestras don't hire often...). You are competing against people who have all been in training since age 4, so whatever small influence genes have looms large... and like with pro athletes, there are certainly genetic factors -- musical performance relies very much on extremely fine control of your body, and the shape of your lips, natural size of your chest cavity, etc. etc. will also make some subtle difference beyond what you can achieve with training.
But now let's look at almost any other way to use your life. Almost everything I can think of is a completely different story. Look at what happened to your family member when he left the "pro classical musician" path and went into something else. He knew how to work hard, and he succeeded. I'll bet you he could choose some other field and also succeed.
It's telling that when I meet talented developers, I'm not tempted to hire someone to break their limbs (cf Tonya Harding). I want them to train others, and work with me. With programming (like with most jobs that are not reserved for a few elites in the world), most people currently doing it have done just enough work to be competent (or at least appear competent...), and anyone willing to put in some actual effort can do great things.
And what's even better is that if more people put in some actual effort, the result is that more great things get done, more cool businesses get started (and some actually succeed), and the world is a better place.
There's no end to problems in the world. Any job that's related to solving problems works this way (as opposed to jobs that serve as simple entertainment for the masses, a set of needs that can be met be comparatively few people).
I know this is an unpopular sentiment on this site, but the problem is that everything has at least some genetic component. In the extreme case, rats share about 95% of their DNA with humans but are incapable of doing any of our jobs or even living a decade. Even amongst humans, large differences exist: short people can never become NBA centers, 200cm people can never be great gymnasts, someone with Down's syndrome isn't going to make it as a physicist.
One heart breaking example I witnessed personally was a family member. He wanted more than anything to be a classical musician. From the age of four, he was taught by the same teacher who trained a very successful NY Philharmonic pianist (opera coach). He practiced many hours a day all through his school years and earned both undergraduate and graduate degrees in clarinet performance. By any objective measure he was a very good clarinetist. But he wasn't good enough to make a real living at it. Unlike his mother, who had perfect pitch by the end of grade school, he never developed it. He saw more than one talented peer surpass him in despite his extreme work ethic. In the end, after putting over 25 years of his life and his passion into it, he finally gave up on his dream and became a programmer. Unlike his experiences in music, he very quickly rose to the top of development groups and it was he who was the one surpassing others who had been working at it longer and harder.
Talent matters. There probably haven't been any specific genes linked with business ability as there have been with musical or leaping abilities, but it would be naive to assume that everyone can win if only they sacrifice enough. In many marginal cases, I'm sure effort would make the difference. In other cases, it would just be robbing oneself of valuable time that could be better spent on another pursuit.